80+ Spooky Beetlejuice Quotes from the Classic 80s Horror Film

Beetlejuice quotes have become a staple in pop culture, with the eccentric ghost from Tim Burton’s 1988 film delivering some of the wittiest and most memorable one-liners of all time.

The film follows the adventures of Lydia Deetz, a recently deceased teenager who enlists the help of the titular character, Beetlejuice, to scare away her parents and save her home from being destroyed. 

With his wild hair, striped suit, and chaotic antics, Beetlejuice quickly became a fan-favorite character. His clever and humorous remarks have been quoted and referenced by fans for decades.

Greatest Beetlejuice Quotes for the Strange and Unusual

Here are some of the most memorable quotes from Beetlejuice:

• I didn’t realize you were into the supernatural. 
• I’m trying to cut down myself. 
• What did you expect, you’re dead.
• How do I look? There are no mirrors on this side.
• Never trust the living. 
• Aren’t you scared? 
• Night of the what? 
• Living Dead. It’s a movie. 
• Won’t or can’t? 
• I’m gonna get her.
• No. Lydia. We’re dead.
• We’re very unhappy.
• Things seem pretty quiet. Thank God you didn’t die in Italy. 
• This is what happens when you die. That is what happens when he dies. And that is what happens when they die. It’s all very personal. And I’ll tell you something: if I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have had my little accident. 
• Whew! Thank you, thank you! That is why I won’t do two shows a night anymore, babe, I won’t, I won’t do them. 

Beetlejuice Quotes by Beetlejuice

Step into the world of the strange and supernatural with Beetlejuice, the ghostly trickster who revels in mayhem and humor. With his off-the-wall personality and quick wit, he’s the ultimate tour guide for the afterlife.

• Nice f***ing model!
• Ah. Well, I attended Juilliard. I’m a graduate of the Harvard business school. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that.
• Cute couple. Look nice and stupid too. 
• Go ahead. Make my millennium!
• I wonder where a guy, an everyday Joe like myself, can find a little action. 
• I’ll do anything to get your business. Hell, I’ll possess myself if I gotta. I’ve got demons running all through me.
• I’ll eat anything you want me to eat. I’ll swallow anything you want me to swallow! So, come on down, and I’ll chew on a dog!
• I’m just doin’ my job. Besides, I thought we had a deal! Hey, it’s OK… You know why? I don’t wanna do business with you deadbeats anyway. 
• It’s showtime. 
• Not so fast, round boy. We’re gonna have some laughs. 
• Sandworms…you know I hate ’em! 
• The only one I think I can deal with is Edgar Allan Poe’s daughter. I think she understands me. 
• These aren’t my rules. Come to think of it. I don’t have any rules. 
• We come for your daughter, Chuck. 
• Welcome to Winter River, museum of natural greed; a monument to the bored businessman! Come on a little closer! Step right up! Test your strength! 
• Well, I’ve read through that handbook for the recently deceased. It says, ‘live people ignore the strange and unusual. I, myself, am strange and unusual.

Beetlejuice Quotes by Barbara Maitland

Say hello to Barbara Maitland, the recently deceased wife and homemaker who finds herself navigating the afterlife in Tim Burton’s “Beetlejuice.” With her quirky fashion sense and eagerness to start a new life, Barbara proves that death can’t dampen her adventurous spirit.

• Adam, you had a photo of Big Foot! 
• You know, if I had seen a ghost at your age, I would have been scared out of my wits.
• It just says ‘won’t.’ God, this book is so stupid. I can’t understand anything in it.
• Rule number two: The living usually won’t see the dead.
• Well, I can’t clean anything properly. The vacuum’s out in the garage and we can’t leave the house. Why don’t they tell us something? I mean, where are all the other dead people in the world? Why is it just you and me?
• In heaven, there wouldn’t be dust on everything.
• Jane, don’t send people photos of our house.
• What’s the good of being a ghost if you can’t frighten people away?
• Why did you disappear when you stepped off the porch? Are we halfway to heaven, are we halfway to hell? How long is this gonna last?

Beetlejuice Quotes by Adam Maitland

Adam Maitland, the loving and devoted husband, who finds himself trapped in the afterlife and forced to navigate the strange and unusual world of the supernatural. With his quiet demeanor and unwavering spirit, Adam proves to be a true force of good, even in the face of bizarre and frightening challenges.

• What are your qualifications?
• Cabin fever, hon?
• Fine, you look fine. Messenger: Yeah? Barbara: Fine. Messenger: Thanks, I’ve been feeling a little flat.
• We’re ghosts!
• Barb, honey… we’re dead. I don’t think we have very much to worry about anymore. 

Beetlejuice Quotes by Otho

Otho, the interior designer with a flair for the supernatural, brings his ghostly talents to the Deetz household in the 1988 film, Beetlejuice. With his quirky fashion sense, devil-may-care attitude, and supernatural abilities, Otho is the ultimate wingman for the ghostly duo of Beetlejuice and Lydia Deetz.

• Don’t mind her. She’s still upset that somebody dropped a house on her sister.
• I have a feeling there’s something very interesting behind that door. 
• I know just as much about the supernatural as I do about interior design. 
• There’s absolutely no organic flowthrough.
• You read my mind. So few people are able to read my mind. They’re just not open to the experience. 
• You’ve read my mind! So few clients are up for the experience! 

Beetlejuice Quotes by Lydia Deetz

Lydia Deetz is a recently deceased gothic teenager caught between the world of the living and the afterlife. With her sharp wit and creative spirit, she navigates the bizarre world of the ghostly realm with determination and a touch of dark humor.

• What do you look like under there?
• I’m not scared of sheets. Are you gross under there? Are you Night of the Living Dead under there? Like all bloody veins and pus?
• Are you a ghost, too?
• Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!
• I am alone. I am *utterly* alone. 
• I plan to have a stroke from the amount of MSG that’s in this food. 
• I wanna be dead too.
• My whole life is a dark room. One big, dark room. Delia Deetz: So you were miserable in New York City, and now you’re going to be miserable out here in the sticks. At least someone’s life hasn’t been upheaved.
• Are you the guys hiding out in the attic?
• Shh! They didn’t commit suicide.
• Maybe you can relax in a haunted house, but I can’t.
• Sick! Sexual perversion! If you’re going to do weird sexual stuff, you ought to stay in your bedroom, OK?
• They wanted me to dissect a frog; I told them it was against my religion.

Beetlejuice Quotes by Charles Deetz

Charles Deetz, the wealthy businessman, is a man of elegance and control in the afterlife, but he is also the foil to the chaotic antics of Beetlejuice. A picture of sophistication, he struggles to keep his life and home in order, while also trying to please his eccentric wife, Delia.

• And look at that kitchen. You’re finally going to be able to cook a decent meal. 
• As soon as we get settled, we’ll build you a darkroom in the basement, okay?
• Yeah, well you know, maybe the house could use a little remodeling. Uh… But, why don’t you just leave this room alone, okay?

Beetlejuice Quotes by Delia Deetz

Delia is emotional and overly dramatic, driven to succeed as an artist and social climb, despite being viewed as not credible by others. She is a perfectionist, critical of her husband and stepdaughter, and prioritizes her own interests above their own.

• A little gasoline, blowtorch, no problem. 
• I noticed that too; it’s like a giant… ant farm.
• If you don’t let me gut out this house and make it my own, I will go insane, and I will take you with me!
• Open this door, you dead people, or we’ll bust it down and we’ll drag you out by the ropes you hang yourselves with!
• I’m here with you. I will live with you in this hellhole, but I must express myself.
• If you tell me what you do, I’ll tell you why my husband will fire you.
• It doesn’t matter. Lydia, I have a chance to teach you something here: You have got to take the upper hand in all situations or people, whether they’re dead or alive.
• Please, they’re dead. It’s a little late to be neurotic.
• This is my art, and it is dangerous. You think I want to die like this!

Beetlejuice Funny Quotes

Here are some of the funny quotes from Beetlejuice to tickle your funnybone:

• Coach? I don’t think we survived that crash!
• I heard. Tore your faces right off. It obviously doesn’t do any good to pull your heads off in front of people if they can’t see you! 
• I’m tellin’ ya, honey, she meant nothin’ to me. Nothin’ at all! 
• I’m the ghost with the most, babe.
• If you act now, you get a free demon possession with every exorcism.
• If you insist on frightening people, do it with your sculptures.
• Let’s turn on the juice and see what shakes loose.

About the Movie – Beetlejuice

“Beetlejuice” is a 1988 American comedy-fantasy film directed by Tim Burton. The movie follows the story of a recently deceased couple, who, after becoming ghosts, hire a wild and anarchic bio-exorcist named Beetlejuice to help them haunt the new occupants of their former home and drive them away.

With its imaginative storyline, quirky characters, and visually stunning sets and costumes, “Beetlejuice” has become a beloved classic that appeals to audiences of all ages. The film’s lead actor, Michael Keaton, delivers a scene-stealing performance as the titular character.

The soundtrack features a mix of novelty songs and eerie instrumental pieces, adding to its distinct and unforgettable atmosphere. “Beetlejuice” is a timeless film that continues to entertain and inspire new generations of movie-goers.

About the Director – Tim Burton

Tim Burton is a celebrated filmmaker known for his unique and visually stunning storytelling style. With a distinct gothic and macabre aesthetic, he has created a genre of his own in the world of cinema.

Throughout his career, Burton has directed some of the most iconic and beloved films of our time, including “Edward Scissorhands,” “Batman,” “Beetlejuice,” “Big Fish,” “Alice in Wonderland,” etc. 

He has a knack for creating imaginative and fantastical worlds populated by larger-than-life characters. With his use of dark humor, imaginative storytelling, and visually stunning imagery, Tim Burton has established himself as one of our time’s most creative and influential filmmakers.